GardenLend

Well, it just goes to show how unaware you can be: I just found out that October 1st was “World Vegetarian Day.”  What a relief that I did not miss out on the whole month.

More info at: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/world-vegetarian-day.html

“What”, I hear you cry, “has this to do with me?”  Well, quite a bit.

A vegetarian diet is good for you because:

• It is healthier - processed foods are just not as good for you
• It takes far more cow food to feed a cow only to eat it than is required to gain the same nutrition by people eating the grain and cereal crop - and cutting out the middle cow from the cycle of birth, exploitation, death, use of dwindling resources and general rumination
• the Bible tells us so; as do most religious texts if you squint at them hard enough with the lights low
• it is far easier to grow plants to eat than to have a cow wandering around your back garden, although possibly not as much fun in the short term

Since the chances of finding someone willing to make garden-space for your errant bovine is limited to the point of extreme unlikelihood, why not instead offer to grow plants, fruits and flowers in their garden?  The garden gets to look better and become productive, you all have a nice warm feeling like you have just eaten the Ready Brek kid and helped save the world and the cow gets to roam freely elsewhere.  All this and the added health benefits thrown in for free.  What are you waiting for - some gun-toting longhorn to rally the sleeping herds?

Another benefit - you can even get to cook and eat the resulting produce.  Some fab recipe books are to be found in our shop.  Please drop by and have a look around.

Thanks for bearing with me, please join GardenLend, if only for the cows …

Ian

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Well, now that summer is well and truly upon us, as evinced by the appalling weather, all thoughts of global warming, imminent environment and economic disaster and who is doing what to whom on Big EastOaksDale Street are far from our febrile imaginings and we return once again to the thorny subject of growing food and the even thornier issue of controlling weeds.

The battlefield that is the allotment is flourishing: on one side, crowds of courgettes, avalanches of aubergines, kit bags of kale, tonnes of tomatoes, farragoes of French beans, regiments of runner beans, plenty of peas, battalions of beetroot, phalanxes of fennel, legions of lettuce and rocket; ranked in opposition are nettle Ninjas, throngs of thistles and encircled by brigades of brambles, all convulsed by Convolvulus. 

Into this maelstrom, I - the brave Ulysses of the piece - must venture, mattock and secateurs at the ready, with only a watering can for reinforcements, and - if I am lucky - a pair of gardening gloves to keep skin and bone together.

Heartened by the weekly broadcasts of Garrison Keillor with the news from Lake Wobegon online at http://prairiehome.publicradio.org/ I survey the allotment, making a note of my foes arrayed against me and the means and methods of overcoming their collective, joint and several baleful influences on my good nature and that of the plot where we grow food.  Immediately, an idea springs to mind: is it possible to eat *all* this stuff - weeds and all?  Hence the first Competition:

Competition #1

Which “weeds” can be eaten, how should they be prepared / cooked and what precautions should be taken to avoid heartburn, indigestion, flared (or drainpipe) ulcers and death?

Competition #2

Shortly after this flash of inspiration, the answers to which might be found in “Food for Free” by Richard Mabey, available from our shop, another question comes to mind: what on earth is that plant?

As you can see from the photo, it is rather larger than a domestic car, although perspective may have something to do with that; a more detailed photograph is available here.  It appeared first a year or so ago and its roots go somewhere down into the very depths of Abaddon, or at least under a neighbouring buried railway sleeper, and so is a bit of a challenge when it comes to removal.  Does anyone have any ideas what it is, if it is edible and - if so - any recipes for it?

Prize(s)

For both competitions, please post answers as comments.  Should either of these questions be satisfactorily resolved, the winner(s) will have a nice, warm glow in the knowledge that they have helped us and our readers find a better use for weeds generally and this Behemoth specifically.  As well as this feeling gained from the philanthropic sharing of horticultural and culinary knowledge, a permanent link will be placed on this site to a (suitable - Editor’s discretion prevails) site or blog of the winner’s choice, as well as the responses being made available on the blog, at which for all to marvel in awe-struck astonishment.

That’s the news from the allotment where all the vegetables are thriving, the weeds are threatened and the what’s-its-name is plain mysterious.  (Apologies G.K.)

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